With all the tv coverage on the latest "soon to be" health disaster swine flu, it almost appears the swine's are getting even with us for our love of sausage. So the next time you open that package of bacon, make sure you look over your shoulder because...
Oh wait. It's a flu, that started with swine? Wow, i've always heard that pigs were smart, and now they've found a way to wipe us humans out with...
Look, i'm not trying to be funny, (oh wait, yes i am!) but my lack of humor is beside the point. Yes, people in Mexico have died from swine flu. People in Wisconsin die from drunken drivers. Maybe it's the fear of being struck down by something you can't see, much like any of those horror movies that have Jason in them, where you just know you shouldn't spend the night in that abandened summer camphouse, but you just can't help it...although in this case it's the flu, and it's hiding out in a beach near Cancun...well that explains the recent swine flu case involving drunken college students...i presume they had plenty to drink but you know what, maybe they were all sipping tea...no wait, they were college kids in Cancun! Are you sure they weren't drinking the water?
I can remember the hysteria over Aids in the 80's...Oh my goodness, beware of gay men! Oh wait, it's a virus...it affects the immune system. You don't have to be gay to get it. It's viral opportunity, let your guard down, let your immune system suffer, and one of many hundreds of thousands of viruses just waiting for their chance will pounce.
So don't eat meat, stomach cancer, don't go out in the sun, skin cancer, don't fly in airplanes, terrorists. Do like i'm planning to do, lay in a fetal position on the couch with a glass of red wine and the weather channel on the tube...til the husband stops paying the cable bill (or i run out of red wine) and i'm forced to go back to work.
My grandmother Reba Davison, who was a nurse and spent her life in the health industry survived the great flu epidemic of 1917-1918 and i asked her if she was ever scared. "No," she said, "i just washed my hands, washed my hands." And honestly, that's the best way to prevent most flu's, cold's, noroviruses, and um...colds, wait, i said that already.
So tonite, wash your hands, wash your hands, turn off the news, and enjoy the sunset...now where's my red wine?
2 comments:
Huzzah! Someone else who can see through the mass hysteria. And mass hysteria it is. It's just something new for the media to get everyone all worked up about. Remember when sharks and stingrays were the number one killer? No, they really weren't and neither is the swine flu. So why did my sons school close down for the next week or so? I can't figure it out. Me? I'm getting even. I'm having bacon for breakfast, ham sandwich for lunch and pork chops for dinner. Oh yea, and I'm refusing to cast my pearls before swine flu also.
Hi Jeffrey,
Great to hear from you! Honestly, i don't doubt that this flu virus could be dangerous, because viruses DO MUTATE...that's how a virus survives, that's the REAL reason there is no AIDS Vaccine. Just when they think they have the DNA, the virus mutates again. I'm with you on "why the heck is everything closing down." If the fear is a much stronger "swine" flu returning in the fall, wouldn't you want to catch it now to develop antibodies, much like the flu shot they give every fall. I also realize i could be full of it, and i don't doubt that either. But, and maybe it's just because i stayed awake in class for this section of health when i was in school, the symptoms sound more like diptheria.
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