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Monday, April 17, 2006

A new DOG DIET? What the...?!

Actually, it's not a diet for your dog...not that my dog couldn't use it...he needs to lose a few pounds cuz he's eating what i'm eating which come to think of it i need to lose...

Which is exactly why i LOVE this new book A DOG DIET...A MEMOIR...here's the deal, you can lose weight by owning a dog...which i can tell you does work...just by buying a dog and paying his first vet bill which turned out to be a couple of hundred dollars...my billfold instantly became several pounds lighter which in turn transulated into exactly 2 ounces on my scale!

Seriously, and by the way i was...it's a really great NEW book written by Patti Lawson which i enjoyed because...well, i love dogs...she writes on how her dog helped her lose weight by annoying her out of bed each morning to walk her...which, believe it or not...excercising in morning burns more stored fat (at least 20 percent worth!) then any other time of the day...unless of course your walking the dog over to Honeydipp donuts...other things her dog taught her about losing weight..."if it's quiet and doesn't smell good...EAT IT"..."if your dog likes your snack...you probably shouldn't eat it"...and most importantly..."the duties of dog care aren't burdens...their calorie consumers!"

THINGS I LEARNED FROM MY DOG...

My neighbors dog is in heat.
The cat's litter box smells.
There are mice in our crawl space.
Einsteins special theory of relativity in which space and time are intimately connected...oh wait...that was the cat!

Friday, April 07, 2006

Cindy in Jamaica...OR...where is all the tequila????


ANSWER: Apparently in Mexico...

I found this out when i ordered a Margarita and they put RUM in it..."don't you have tequila?" i asked and they said yes...and proceeded to pour in the rum...but then i discovered who needs tequila when you can have hummingbirds...or even, beer margaritas...now i know your thinking...this isn't gonna be a whole blog post dedicated to what Huber drank in Jamaica...BETTER...this is a blog post with RECIPES...you can thank me later...

I was lucky enough to be selected as a host to our awesome KTI listeners who won our Jamaica vacation contest and i can honestly tell you...they weren't only winners of our contest...they were winners in my book...what a wonderful group of people...i loved each and every one of you...and shared hangovers with you too!

Before i left, i heard stories about how Jamaicans drive and i can honestly tell you that ALL Jamaicans drive like their from Illinois!!!!! Honestly, they all drive like they're in a hurry to get to eternity, barreling down the wrong side of narrow beat up roads like "NO PROBLEM MON"...the only thing missing was the toll booths!!
Most surprising (to me) about Jamaica is what i had NEVER HEARD OF...the incredible number of KFC's...that's right friend...Kentucky Fried Chickens...the Jamaicans LOVE our KFC's and there were a ton of them spread out from Montego Bay all the way to Negril...our Jamaican driver explained it to us this way, to Jamaican women KFC stands for Keep From Cooking!

The RIU Negril was an incredibly beautiful place that has probably ruined any other destination vacation for me forever...going to "scenic South Dakota" just doesn't have the same sparkle...or BEACHES!

What i found surreal about the whole Negril, Jamaica vacation is just how the Americans are the minority in this resort...it was a slightly bizarre although extremely satisfying experience sitting in a beach chair next to vacationers from all over the world and trying to guess by their accents which was which...and because the RIU Negril is really a family resort...i got a kick out of watching families from other countries (France, Spain, South America, England Germany, and Canada) argue with each other...that's right boys and girls...it's not just the Yanks who don't understand their kids! That said, you can go ALL around the world and still run into people you know...the very first night in the buffet hall my husband (who is a mortician) ran into someone whose family member he buried several months before...we spent the next several days trying to give them their privacy...BUT...we KEPT RUNNING INTO THEM!!!

OH!...and it's not just the Americans who are noticing the "greenhouse effect"...i spent about 30 minutes with a couple from London and the bartender from Jamaica discussing this same topic...the couple from London have noticed that their winters are much milder with spring, summer and fall far less enjoyable as a result...while the Jamaican bartender has complained that the weather has become much less enjoyable in the last few years because of the heat...

Surreal Moment...Up on top of a mountain in the middle of the Jamaican rain forest and far away from the resort...our guides had a small little radio playing a Jamaican radio station with Jamaican tunes when all of a sudden the jock puts on the Pussycat Dolls "Stickwitu"...

and one more thought...our same guides showed us what they called "hanging trees" where Jamaican slaves were hung for whatever their master deemed "misbehaving"...which is why there are no "happy ghosts" in Jamaica...all the spirits are very angry and our guides are afraid of them!


And now for the RECIPES!!!!


Hummingbirds!

1 oz. rum cream, 1 oz. Tia Maria, 1/2 oz. Grenadine, 1 oz. coconut milk, 1/2 banana (whole) and 1 to 2 cups ice-crushed...throw everything in a blender and blend til smooth...go ahead, thank me later!

Beer Margaritas!

6 oz. tequila, 6 oz. beer, 6 oz. frozen limeade concentrate, and ice cubes...put all the ingrediants in the cup first then cap with the beer...Tequila and beer, does it get any better!!!